12.08.19 — The DW Sunday Column: This is unusual — We are left to “wonder”
What happens when Google or Alexa can’t help us?
Several years ago, we watched a live comedy show. The star was Paul Reiser. The theme of his set was that “we are no longer left to wonder.”
You know, “I wonder what the temperature is outside.” “I wonder who won the Cardinals game?”
Here is a snapshot of “then” vs “now”…
“I wonder if it will rain five days from now?”
Then: Look for the paper, hope it has your city listed with the 7-day forecast. What the news, wait until about 10 after the hour, and again, hope they mention your city and your day.”
Now: Hey Alexa, what is the temperature in Phoenix next Thursday? A: On Thursday, Dec. 12, in Phoenix, Arizona expect a high of 68 degrees.
Another example: “I bet you $10 that there was a four-way tie in the American League home run race in 1981 with 22 home runs.”
Then: It was like poker, why would they say four were tied? Was it three? 22 HRs seems low, maybe there was a tie, but more HRs. This is 50–50…I pick xxxx…And then, the answer was dug up in an old book, or from memory, because you were a fan of Tony Armas, Dwight Evans, Bobby Grich or Eddie Murray. Trust me, some of these trivia bets took weeks to declare a winner.
Now: Google the history of HR leaders…A: three down, boom: https://www.baseball-almanac.com/hitting/hihr5.shtml
Now this leads me to my hiking story. Since the start of the hiking season in Phoenix, in October, I have been to about five trailheads. They have been in either Phoenix or Peoria. Right at the beginning of each trail, there is a metal…um…thing…. I could be wrong, but “last hiking season (May 2019) they were not there.
That leads me to ask my hiking friends, “What is it?” Each time the answer is, “I don’t know.” At first, it did not bother me. But now, no one knows, and I pass one, almost daily.
So, let me describe this metal thing….it is about two feet high. The metal is pretty firm, like an old pipe or the metal used for a streetlight. Each one is the same size, and each one has the same “overhang” with something in it.
Yes, dare I say “I wonder” …what it is?
This time, things are different.
Back in the day: I wonder what is the ….metal thing, that is about two feet tall, sometimes brown, sometimes painted tan, with an overhang thing that has some sort of something like a round opening under the overhang….….
Now: Hey Alexa, in Peoria East Wing Mountain there is a metal thing, that is about two feet tall, sometimes brown, sometimes painted tan, with an overhang thing that has some sort of something like a round opening under the overhang….…. Alexa: Hmmmm, I don’t know that.
Now: Google — Peoria East Wing Mountain there is a metal thing, that is about two feet tall, sometimes brown, sometimes painted tan, with an overhang thing that has some sort of something like a round opening under the overhang….….the return: images for East Wing Mountain; Peoria’s Trail System; Arizona hike: East Wing Mountain hikes. …ok, let’s knock off the city and mountain name….the return: Metal window awnings — Pinterest; 81 best metal roof images in 2019…and a few other architect stories that look pretty darn boring.
So there it is…we are in 2019 and I am left to wonder. This article will not end with the answer. This story is almost done. I will not be telling you that someone knew what it was. There will be no answer. None. Nothing. Seriously.
Does that drive you crazy? Shouldn’t we know the answer to everything? I mean I can tell you the AL home run champ in 1943 for gosh sakes! (it was Rudy York).
This metal thing could be a water hookup (doubtful, too small); a path that will allow wiring to be put in (seems like weird possibility); a scanner, like at the grocery store (unlikely); a people counter, counting everyone that goes by and reporting it to the federal government (for my conspiracy theory audience); an alien set up where little gremlin type things will flow out when they decide to attack (for my alien following audience)…
That’s it. Seriously, I don’t have the answer. Just like Ferris Bueller…at the end of the movie…”It’s over. Go home. Go.” (well, do read the last two paragraphs after Ferris).
Is it driving you crazy? In this instant credit, instant access, instant answer world, how should we react when we are not given the answer? And we may never find out the answer.
Hmmmm…I wonder.
References — Credits — Links — Sources
All photos: Don Watz
Home run information: https://www.baseball-almanac.com/hitting/hihr5.shtml
